This Is Not How the Story Is Going To End

At any given moment you have the power to say  This is NOT how the story is going to end.

Oh how I love this.  But how do we help those in deep pain to love it, too?

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In memory of my beloved husband John Kelly Snyder… 20 Sept 1956 – 21 Oct 2016.

My Johnny was a true warrior, fighting demons no one else could see.  I thought he was the strongest man in the world, and perhaps he was, but tragically, the demons got the better of him.

The name of this project is in no way intended to be reflective of, or piggy back off, Wounded Warriors which serves those military personnel wounded after September 11, 20o1.  Like too many others, John was a warrior long before then.

Fair winds and following seas, Husband.

**************************************

We now have a group on Facebook to help find resources, support and ideas for getting The Grief Warrior Project off the ground.  You can find us there at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thewarriorproject/

Follow us on Twitter!  @WarriorProjME.

Help support The Grief Warrior Project by making purchases from Heritage Collectibles, Books & Maps.  All profits (after expenses) go to helping us help others.  You can find Heritage Collectibles at  https://heritagecollectiblesmaine.com, on Facebook (both a group and a page) and on Twitter (HeritageGifts).

**************************************

Despite decades of disbelief, I have come to realize that our loved ones are able to communicate with us through the life/death barrier.  My Johnny has proved this in ways that I can’t attribute to my own mind making things up… there have been complex coincidences and synchronicities, extraordinary happenings, and messages through others who could not possibly have any knowledge of the information they’ve passed on.  Truly mind-blowing stuff.  I don’t have a clue what I believe about life after death, but I know my husband loved me with everything he had, and that he still does.  Our wedding vows were “to death and beyond” and that has proved true for both of us.

I can’t tell you how it all works, or how you can get through to your own loved one, but if you’re interested, I can tell you of my experiences and my thoughts on this.

Posted in Inspirational, Suicide | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Costumes of Identity

This deserves much more than a simple reposting, and at some point I will explore it further.  But for now, I think it’s an important enough message as it stands, to not have to wait for whatever poor words I can find to add to it.

***************************************

In memory of my beloved husband John Kelly Snyder… 20 Sept 1956 – 21 Oct 2016.

My Johnny was a true warrior, fighting demons no one else could see.  I thought he was the strongest man in the world, and perhaps he was, but tragically, the demons got the better of him.

The name of this project is in no way intended to be reflective of, or piggy back off, Wounded Warriors which serves those military personnel wounded after September 11, 20o1.  Like too many others, John was a warrior long before then.

Fair winds and following seas, Husband.

**************************************

We now have a group on Facebook to help find resources, support and ideas for getting The Grief Warrior Project off the ground.  You can find us there at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thewarriorproject/

Follow us on Twitter!  @WarriorProjME.

Help support The Grief Warrior Project by making purchases from Heritage Collectibles, Books & Maps.  All profits (after expenses) go to helping us help others.  You can find Heritage Collectibles at  https://heritagecollectiblesmaine.com, on Facebook (both a group and a page) and on Twitter (HeritageGifts).

**************************************

Despite decades of disbelief, I have come to realize that our loved ones are able to communicate with us through the life/death barrier.  My Johnny has proved this in ways that I can’t attribute to my own mind making things up… there have been complex coincidences and synchronicities, extraordinary happenings, and messages through others who could not possibly have any knowledge of the information they’ve passed on.  Truly mind-blowing stuff.  I don’t have a clue what I believe about life after death, but I know my husband loved me with everything he had, and that he still does.  Our wedding vows were “to death and beyond” and that has proved true for both of us.

I can’t tell you how it all works, or how you can get through to your own loved one, but if you’re interested, I can tell you of my experiences and my thoughts on this.

Posted in Inspirational, Loneliness | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Be A Light

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In memory of my beloved husband John Kelly Snyder… 20 Sept 1956 – 21 Oct 2016.

My Johnny was a true warrior, fighting demons no one else could see.  I thought he was the strongest man in the world, and perhaps he was, but tragically, the demons got the better of him.

The name of this project is in no way intended to be reflective of, or piggy back off, Wounded Warriors which serves those military personnel wounded after September 11, 20o1.  Like too many others, John was a warrior long before then.

Fair winds and following seas, Husband.

**************************************

We now have a group on Facebook to help find resources, support and ideas for getting The Grief Warrior Project off the ground.  You can find us there at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thewarriorproject/

Follow us on Twitter!  @WarriorProjME.

Help support The Grief Warrior Project by making purchases from Heritage Collectibles, Books & Maps.  All profits (after expenses) go to helping us help others.  You can find Heritage Collectibles at  https://heritagecollectiblesmaine.com, on Facebook (both a group and a page) and on Twitter (HeritageGifts).

**************************************

Despite decades of disbelief, I have come to realize that our loved ones are able to communicate with us through the life/death barrier.  My Johnny has proved this in ways that I can’t attribute to my own mind making things up… there have been complex coincidences and synchronicities, extraordinary happenings, and messages through others who could not possibly have any knowledge of the information they’ve passed on.  Truly mind-blowing stuff.  I don’t have a clue what I believe about life after death, but I know my husband loved me with everything he had, and that he still does.  Our wedding vows were “to death and beyond” and that has proved true for both of us.

I can’t tell you how it all works, or how you can get through to your own loved one, but if you’re interested, I can tell you of my experiences and my thoughts on this.

Posted in Inspirational, Suicide | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Expanded Holiday Hours at the Bookstore That Supports The Grief Warrior Project

Heritage Collectibles, Books & Maps is the antiques shop & used bookstore that John and I started two years before he suicided.  It was a dream of his, to have a little shop where he could research cool items, read great books, and talk to customers about the many, many topics he was an expert in … or at least more than passably familiar with.

It’s been really tough keeping the shop going without him.  It doesn’t make enough money for me to run it full time; nor can I afford to hire anyone.  But it was Johnny’s dream, and I have this overwhelming, continuing need to honor that dream.

Besides, the shop has a classroom that I’ve named The Lifeboat Room, which is where we hold grief-related support groups, and is a place for those feeling stressed by the world to sit for a while in a calm environment.  And, everything sold at the shop (or at our booth in Oxford at the Undercover Antique Mall) goes to support The Grief Warrior Project, to help us keep our doors open.

Your purchase is critical in helping to make that happen.  (Check out the website at https://www.heritagecollectiblesmaine.com, or find us on Facebook and Twitter.)

For the next few weeks (during the holiday season), Heritage Collectibles will have expanded hours!

We’ll be open most Tuesdays through Saturdays from 1:00-6:00, and occasional Sundays.  Or, we can be open by appointment (call Linda at 207-740-2247).

As of right now, we do know we’ll be closed on Thursday, November 29th, as I have to be out of town during the mid-day, and have an event to attend in the late afternoon.

The coffee pot is always on!  And we have cookies!

Come on in for the ambiance, conversation, or just to get away from it all.  We have a comfy classroom/group room where you can escape for a while… (As you can see, the dogs are often in attendance, as well.)

You can also find vintage and antique items at Heritage Collectibles’ booth at the Undercover Antique Mall in Oxford, Maine!  They’re open every day from 9:00 am – 5:00 pm.

All sales, after expenses, go to support The Grief Warrior Project, a suicide prevention drop-in center in development.  The Grief Warrior Project‘s support group room is located at Heritage Collectibles.  FMI: Linda, 207 / 740-2247.

Update, 02/02/2019:  I’ve had to close Heritage Collectibles’ physical shop.  It was too much to do on my own, and despite my efforts, it was too hard without my John – the shop was created for him, it was to be his retirement gig.  Without him, the excitement, the passion, the dream… gone.  And I was losing money on the business, money I could not afford to lose any longer as it was putting everything else we loved at risk.

I will, however, continue with the business via the Undercover Antique Mall, and probably through Amazon and other mail order resources.

***************************************

In memory of my beloved husband John Kelly Snyder… 20 Sept 1956 – 21 Oct 2016.

My Johnny was a true warrior, fighting demons no one else could see.  I thought he was the strongest man in the world, and perhaps he was, but tragically, the demons got the better of him.

The name of this project is in no way intended to be reflective of, or piggy back off, Wounded Warriors which serves those military personnel wounded after September 11, 20o1.  Like too many others, John was a warrior long before then.

Fair winds and following seas, Husband.

**************************************

We now have a group on Facebook to help find resources, support and ideas for getting The Grief Warrior Project off the ground.  You can find us there at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thewarriorproject/

Follow us on Twitter!  @WarriorProjME.

Help support The Grief Warrior Project by making purchases from Heritage Collectibles, Books & Maps.  All profits (after expenses) go to helping us help others.  You can find Heritage Collectibles at  https://heritagecollectiblesmaine.com, on Facebook (both a group and a page) and on Twitter (HeritageGifts).

**************************************

Despite decades of disbelief, I have come to realize that our loved ones are able to communicate with us through the life/death barrier.  My Johnny has proved this in ways that I can’t attribute to my own mind making things up… there have been complex coincidences and synchronicities, extraordinary happenings, and messages through others who could not possibly have any knowledge of the information they’ve passed on.  Truly mind-blowing stuff.  I don’t have a clue what I believe about life after death, but I know my husband loved me with everything he had, and that he still does.  Our wedding vows were “to death and beyond” and that has proved true for both of us.

I can’t tell you how it all works, or how you can get through to your own loved one, but if you’re interested, I can tell you of my experiences and my thoughts on this.

Posted in Grief, Heritage Collectibles Books & Maps, Suicide | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Planning Meeting for Suicide Prevention Drop-In Center, Nov 5

A reminder that a planning meeting to develop a suicide prevention drop-in center is scheduled for tomorrow (Monday, November 5) from 5:30-7:30 at Heritage Collectibles, where The Grief Warrior Project support group meets. Enter 9 Park Street, Lewiston into your GPS.

Park anywhere on the street; there’s no need to feed the meters after 5:00.

Please forgive the condition of the shop… I recently got in around 5,000 books and haven’t been able to get them all organized yet.  However, the group room is comfortable and available!

And there’ll be coffee and other beverages available, as well as snacks (hummus, crackers, cookies, leftover Halloween candy, etc!).

Thank you!
Linda

***************************************

In memory of my beloved husband John Kelly Snyder… 20 Sept 1956 – 21 Oct 2016.

My Johnny was a true warrior, fighting demons no one else could see.  I thought he was the strongest man in the world, and perhaps he was, but tragically, the demons got the better of him.

The name of this project is in no way intended to be reflective of, or piggy back off, Wounded Warriors which serves those military personnel wounded after September 11, 20o1.  Like too many others, John was a warrior long before then.

Fair winds and following seas, Husband.

**************************************

We now have a group on Facebook to help find resources, support and ideas for getting The Grief Warrior Project off the ground.  You can find us there at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thewarriorproject/

Follow us on Twitter!  @WarriorProjME.

Help support The Grief Warrior Project by making purchases from Heritage Collectibles, Books & Maps.  All profits (after expenses) go to helping us help others.  You can find Heritage Collectibles at  https://heritagecollectiblesmaine.com, on Facebook (both a group and a page) and on Twitter (HeritageGifts).

**************************************

Despite decades of disbelief, I have come to realize that our loved ones are able to communicate with us through the life/death barrier.  My Johnny has proved this in ways that I can’t attribute to my own mind making things up… there have been complex coincidences and synchronicities, extraordinary happenings, and messages through others who could not possibly have any knowledge of the information they’ve passed on.  Truly mind-blowing stuff.  I don’t have a clue what I believe about life after death, but I know my husband loved me with everything he had, and that he still does.  Our wedding vows were “to death and beyond” and that has proved true for both of us.

I can’t tell you how it all works, or how you can get through to your own loved one, but if you’re interested, I can tell you of my experiences and my thoughts on this.

Posted in Grief, Suicide | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Yes, I’d Do It Again

I just read the saddest but one of the most beautiful expressions of love I’ve ever seen.  I don’t have permission to post it here so will offer a quick summary:

At barely 21 years old, this young soul’s husband shot himself to death in her arms as she begged him not to.  She has spent the past two decades dealing with the post-traumatic stress caused by this horrible, devastating incident.

Yet, she says she would do it all over again even if she knew how it would turn out.

The further away from my husband’s death I get, the more aware I am of the toll the pain, fear and denial of John’s hellish world were taking on me.  And the more aware I am of the daily nightmare he was living with, and how hard he worked to fight that pain and fear, to deny their existence and to keep anyone else from knowing how bad it was… even those times when we were angry with him for behaviors we didn’t understand, because he couldn’t explain them.

Her story moved me to tears, because it was also my story. And all I could think of in response was to write:

“Oh sweetie… I’ve said the same thing. My Johnny’s living hell made our lives difficult at times, but if he were to walk through that door right now, I’d do it all over again… even if I knew the outcome would be the same.

Songs of peace and healing to you.”

Songs of peace and healing to all of us.

***************************************

In memory of my beloved husband John Kelly Snyder… 20 Sept 1956 – 21 Oct 2016.

My Johnny was a true warrior, fighting demons no one else could see.  I thought he was the strongest man in the world, and perhaps he was, but tragically, the demons got the better of him.

The name of this project is in no way intended to be reflective of, or piggy back off, Wounded Warriors which serves those military personnel wounded after September 11, 20o1.  Like too many others, John was a warrior long before then.

Fair winds and following seas, Husband.

**************************************

We now have a group on Facebook to help find resources, support and ideas for getting The Grief Warrior Project off the ground.  You can find us there at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thewarriorproject/

Follow us on Twitter!  @WarriorProjME.

Help support The Grief Warrior Project by making purchases from Heritage Collectibles, Books & Maps.  All profits (after expenses) go to helping us help others.  You can find Heritage Collectibles at  https://heritagecollectiblesmaine.com, on Facebook (both a group and a page) and on Twitter (HeritageGifts).

**************************************

Despite decades of disbelief, I have come to realize that our loved ones are able to communicate with us through the life/death barrier.  My Johnny has proved this in ways that I can’t attribute to my own mind making things up… there have been complex coincidences and synchronicities, extraordinary happenings, and messages through others who could not possibly have any knowledge of the information they’ve passed on.  Truly mind-blowing stuff.  I don’t have a clue what I believe about life after death, but I know my husband loved me with everything he had, and that he still does.  Our wedding vows were “to death and beyond” and that has proved true for both of us.

I can’t tell you how it all works, or how you can get through to your own loved one, but if you’re interested, I can tell you of my experiences and my thoughts on this.

Posted in Grief, Suicide | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Creating a Drop-In Center… Can You Help?

Do you have time to…

a) Attend a planning meeting on Monday, November 5th at 5:30, to help turn The Grief Warrior Project drop-in center into a reality – and/or –
b) Attend regular meetings after that – and/or –
b) Drop off brochures to organizations, emergency rooms, police departments, social work offices, and so forth – and/or –
c) Post information on social media regarding The Grief Warrior Project – and/or –
d) Hang out at the Grief Warrior Project offices (which are also the site of Heritage Collectibles, Books & Maps), to be available for anyone who just needs a safe place to be – and/or –
e) Any other ideas?

Are you available Monday evening, November 5 at 5:30 for that planning meeting?

Quick Background Info:

Tomorrow, October 21st, 2018, will mark two years since my beloved husband took his own life.  I won’t get into the whys here – those have been described in other posts.

For nearly that long I have wanted to develop a suicide prevention drop-in center, offering support groups, activities to help people feel valued, or at least, not alone – and just a safe place to hang out.

But I’ve had to work, and I’ve been working a LOT of hours to stabilize my finances after John died.

The goal is still there… I haven’t wavered on that.

I have the space available – a 600+sf retail and office area in downtown Lewiston that houses the greatly downsized Heritage Collectibles, Books & Maps, and includes a small group room as well as a conference room.  (If I had the funds, I could expand back into our old space which is now vacant again… I just don’t have the money for that.)

Anyway, it’s like a chicken or the egg thing… We can’t be helpful to people if we don’t have regular hours, but I haven’t been able to offer regular hours because I had been working what amounted to more than two full-time jobs each week.

In August, I left my job in the social work field in order to regroup, but I have to go back to work soon.  At that time, it will once again become difficult to maintain a steady schedule.

So right now while I have more time available than usual, I really want to start getting this off the ground.

The horrors of suicide have been on everyone’s minds lately… and on mine, constantly.

Please let me know if you can attend a planning meeting on Monday, November 5th at 5:30.

Thanks,
Linda

***

In memory of my beloved husband John Kelly Snyder… 20 Sept 1956 – 21 Oct 2016.

My Johnny was a true warrior, fighting demons no one else could see.  I thought he was the strongest man in the world, and perhaps he was, but tragically, the demons got the better of him.

The name of this project is in no way intended to be reflective of, or piggy back off, Wounded Warriors which serves those military personnel wounded after September 11, 20o1.  Like too many others, John was a warrior long before then.

Fair winds and following seas, Husband.

**************************************

We now have a group on Facebook to help find resources, support and ideas for getting The Grief Warrior Project off the ground.  You can find us there at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thewarriorproject/

Follow us on Twitter!  @WarriorProjME.

Help support The Grief Warrior Project by making purchases from Heritage Collectibles, Books & Maps.  All profits (after expenses) go to helping us help others.  You can find Heritage Collectibles at  https://heritagecollectiblesmaine.com, on Facebook (both a group and a page) and on Twitter (HeritageGifts).

**************************************

Despite decades of disbelief, I have come to realize that our loved ones are able to communicate with us through the life/death barrier.  My Johnny has proved this in ways that I can’t attribute to my own mind making things up… there have been complex coincidences and synchronicities, extraordinary happenings, and messages through others who could not possibly have any knowledge of the information they’ve passed on.  Truly mind-blowing stuff.  I don’t have a clue what I believe about life after death, but I know my husband loved me with everything he had, and that he still does.  Our wedding vows were “to death and beyond” and that has proved true for both of us.

I can’t tell you how it all works, or how you can get through to your own loved one, but if you’re interested, I can tell you of my experiences and my thoughts on this.

Posted in anxiety, Grief, Heritage Collectibles Books & Maps, Loneliness | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment