No Support Groups Until October

Ladies, you know how it is when you go on vacation – the house has to be spotless before you leave because no one wants to come home to a mess.  Right?

Well, with my first biological grandchild due any day (John had 4 of his own, but our children were all grown up when we reunited after more than 35 years, so we have none in common), I’m out straight trying to get our antiques shop & used book store organized before I close it up for the month of September, when I’ll be heading across the country to spend time with my daughter, son-in-law and grandbaby.

And of course, there’s the 3 story house that has to be cleaned, the social work job that takes a lot of time every week, and various committee meetings and other appointments.

So…. since I’ll be in Los Angeles, there’ll be no support group meetings for the month of September, and none for the next two weeks (August 18-31), while I’m trying to get everything under control.

I’m planning to still be available by phone and email, though.  And hopefully I’ll be able to keep up with our Twitter account, too.

Please take good care of yourselves.

*****************************

For more information about The Warrior Project – soon to be a drop-in and counseling center for those affected by suicide and/or suicidal thoughts, please click on the picture or link, or go to https://warrior-project.org.

The Warrior Project will eventually become a warm, welcoming drop-in center for those living with extreme emotional and/or physical pain coupled with hopelessness, and a resource for families and friends fearing for the life of, or grieving the loss of, the person they love so much.

We are accepting blogs and articles written on topics relevant to suicide, hopelessness, grief, and similar topics.  Please contact Linda at LSnyder@regroupbiz.com or warriorprojectmaine@gmail.com.

*************************************

In memory of my beloved husband John Kelly Snyder… 20 Sept 1956 – 21 Oct 2016.

My Johnny was a true warrior, fighting demons no one else could see.  I thought he was the strongest man in the world, and perhaps he was, but tragically, the demons got the better of him.

The name of this project is in no way intended to be reflective of, or piggy back off, Wounded Warriors which serves those military personnel wounded after September 11, 20o1.  Like too many others, John was a warrior long before then.

Fair winds and following seas, Husband.

**************************************

We now have a group on Facebook to help find resources, support and ideas for getting The Warrior Project off the ground.  You can find us there at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thewarriorproject/

Follow us on Twitter!  @WarriorProjME.

**************************************

The Warrior Project is NOT an emergency program or service.

In the event of a crisis, please call 911

In the United States, other numbers to call include:
Maine Crisis Hotline:
1-888-568-1112
National Suicide Prevention Hotline:
800-273-8255
Veterans Suicide Hotline:
800-273-8255
Domestic Violence Hotline:
800-799-7233

*******************************

John and I owned both a small antiques shop and a used bookstore in Lewiston, Maine. After John died, I didn’t know what I wanted to do with the two shops – they take up a huge amount of time, and weren’t yet covering their own costs.  After John died in October of 2016, the shops were barely open during the critical holiday sales season; I couldn’t stand being in them because we had such dreams for the future.

But Johnny loved his little bookstore (Heritage Books, Maps & Ephemera) and the goal was that he would one day “retire” into running the two shops.  So I’ve committed to keeping them open, although Heritage Collectibles is now Heritage Collectibles, Books & Maps as I’ve combined those two businesses, and I’m opening Papa’s Thrift Shop for the inventory that doesn’t really work in the main store.  (Papa is what John’s grandchildren called him.)

All of the profits from those two businesses (after expenses, of course!) will go to support The Warrior Project.  If you are so inclined, please consider checking out our shops, knowing that your purchase will help fund this critically needed suicide prevention drop in center.

Posted in Support Groups | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

His Belongings Still Belong

It’s been 9 1/2 months and I haven’t moved John’s clothing from our closet, his winter jackets from the mudroom, his LL Bean hiking vest with all its pockets from the sofa in the sun room where he left it, or even his toothbrush next to mine in the bathroom (although I did use it by accident a couple of times).

Today I found myself looking at his shoes and – as if I was arguing with someone – said out loud, “No, those are my husband’s and they’re staying right there”.

Arguing with someone?  Who would that be?   Myself?   I don’t think so.  I don’t need to convince myself that his belongings still belong.

I guess I was reminding the universe that I’m still married and still love my husband.

Even if I’m lonely at times.

*****************************

For more information about The Warrior Project – soon to be a drop-in and counseling center for those affected by suicide and/or suicidal thoughts, please click on the picture or link, or go to https://warrior-project.org.

The Warrior Project will eventually become a warm, welcoming drop-in center for those living with extreme emotional and/or physical pain coupled with hopelessness, and a resource for families and friends fearing for the life of, or grieving the loss of, the person they love so much.

We are accepting blogs and articles written on topics relevant to suicide, hopelessness, grief, and similar topics.  Please contact Linda at LSnyder@regroupbiz.com or warriorprojectmaine@gmail.com.

*************************************

In memory of my beloved husband John Kelly Snyder… 20 Sept 1956 – 21 Oct 2016.

My Johnny was a true warrior, fighting demons no one else could see.  I thought he was the strongest man in the world, and perhaps he was, but tragically, the demons got the better of him.

The name of this project is in no way intended to be reflective of, or piggy back off, Wounded Warriors which serves those military personnel wounded after September 11, 20o1.  Like too many others, John was a warrior long before then.

Fair winds and following seas, Husband.

**************************************

We now have a group on Facebook to help find resources, support and ideas for getting The Warrior Project off the ground.  You can find us there at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thewarriorproject/

Follow us on Twitter!  @WarriorProjME.

**************************************

The Warrior Project is NOT an emergency program or service.

In the event of a crisis, please call 911

In the United States, other numbers to call include:
Maine Crisis Hotline:
1-888-568-1112
National Suicide Prevention Hotline:
800-273-8255
Veterans Suicide Hotline:
800-273-8255
Domestic Violence Hotline:
800-799-7233

*******************************

John and I owned both a small antiques shop and a used bookstore in Lewiston, Maine. After John died, I didn’t know what I wanted to do with the two shops – they take up a huge amount of time, and weren’t yet covering their own costs.  After John died in October of 2016, the shops were barely open during the critical holiday sales season; I couldn’t stand being in them because we had such dreams for the future.

But Johnny loved his little bookstore (Heritage Books, Maps & Ephemera) and the goal was that he would one day “retire” into running the two shops.  So I’ve committed to keeping them open, although Heritage Collectibles is now Heritage Collectibles, Books & Maps as I’ve combined those two businesses, and I’m opening Papa’s Thrift Shop for the inventory that doesn’t really work in the main store.  (Papa is what John’s grandchildren called him.)

All of the profits from those two businesses (after expenses, of course!) will go to support The Warrior Project.  If you are so inclined, please consider checking out our shops, knowing that your purchase will help fund this critically needed suicide prevention drop in center.

Posted in Grief, Loneliness, Suicide | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

I Didn’t See It Happening…

With the antiques shop & used book store John and I started and that I’m now running on my own, my social work job, my volunteer activities – and my frequent grief-stricken meltdowns – I don’t do much that’s particularly fun or enjoyable.

— I love my social work job, but all of the client traumas and dynamics get me wound up and emotionally exhausted where they never did before John killed himself.

— The shop is an enormous amount of work that was supposed to be John’s retirement once it started making money and we no longer had to subsidize it with our salaries, but I enjoy it because the financial pieces  – the budgeting and spreadsheets etc – use the more logical, mathematical side of my brain that I need to stay balanced.

— And I’m committed to volunteering as I always have, although I’ve limited those activities significantly and only serve on a couple of boards, rather than half a dozen or more.

— I’m not ready to give any of these up.

If it wasn’t for our dogs (there are now just two of them, since John’s little wire-haired dachshund Buddy died a few months after John did), I probably wouldn’t leave the house except for the activities listed above.  But the poor pups are home alone far too much and they need to get out and greet the world, and see people other than me, and sniff exciting new scents (and poop) other than those same old smells they sniff every day for hours on end in the house and in our yards.

Tonight I was walking the two of them (Rudi and Millie) at a local veteran’s park and had this sudden thought that “it would have been nice if John and I could have come here once in a while”.  After all, the park is only a mile from our home.

That thought was immediately followed by, “but we never did anything”.  John was always too tired, or in too much pain, to want to go anywhere… even for a walk.  And I hadn’t realized before how much our lives had changed so drastically over the years, and how deeply he had slipped into his depression – and drinking far too much – without me realizing it.

I knew he was sick.  After all, I’d dragged him from doctor to doctor and lived through him being hospitalized near death five years before he actually died.  John had many ailments, and was also being monitored for possible lung cancer, which the doctors hadn’t definitively diagnosed, but which John believed he had.

I knew he was in severe pain at times.  I knew he had demons that plagued him that he didn’t talk about.  But I just didn’t see now devastatingly, bone-numbingly exhausting it all was for him, because he didn’t complain much, and he worked hard at putting on a facade to give the impression that it was all manageable.

And now, even though I miss him desperately and am in tears writing this, I realize what a nightmare it was for me, too.  I did everything I could to make his life easier for him.  I took on projects that should have been his, even though I was already exhausted and stretched beyond anyone’s normal limits.

But it wasn’t ever enough; it couldn’t ever be enough.  I lived with a constant anxiety and sense of foreboding. I was terrified that I would come home one evening and find him dead – and he knew how afraid I was of that possible scenario.

Then one day, that over-riding fear that had colored nearly everything I thought and felt and acted on for years, finally came to pass.  The unimaginable happened, and at times it makes me so sick to my very soul that I’m a sobbing puddle on the floor, hurting so badly I want to vomit.

And I’m left with horrible guilt, unending sadness, terrible loneliness – and an ever-so-small amount of relief.

 

 

*****************************

For more information about The Warrior Project – soon to be a drop-in and counseling center for those affected by suicide and/or suicidal thoughts, please click on the picture or link, or go to https://warrior-project.org.

The Warrior Project will eventually become a warm, welcoming drop-in center for those living with extreme emotional and/or physical pain coupled with hopelessness, and a resource for families and friends fearing for the life of, or grieving the loss of, the person they love so much.

We are accepting blogs and articles written on topics relevant to suicide, hopelessness, grief, and similar topics.  Please contact Linda at LSnyder@regroupbiz.com or warriorprojectmaine@gmail.com.

*************************************

In memory of my beloved husband John Kelly Snyder… 20 Sept 1956 – 21 Oct 2016.

My Johnny was a true warrior, fighting demons no one else could see.  I thought he was the strongest man in the world, and perhaps he was, but tragically, the demons got the better of him.

The name of this project is in no way intended to be reflective of, or piggy back off, Wounded Warriors which serves those military personnel wounded after September 11, 20o1.  Like too many others, John was a warrior long before then.

Fair winds and following seas, Husband.

**************************************

We now have a group on Facebook to help find resources, support and ideas for getting The Warrior Project off the ground.  You can find us there at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thewarriorproject/

Follow us on Twitter!  @WarriorProjME.

**************************************

The Warrior Project is NOT an emergency program or service.

In the event of a crisis, please call 911

In the United States, other numbers to call include:
Maine Crisis Hotline:
1-888-568-1112
National Suicide Prevention Hotline:
800-273-8255
Veterans Suicide Hotline:
800-273-8255
Domestic Violence Hotline:
800-799-7233

*******************************

John and I owned both a small antiques shop and a used bookstore in Lewiston, Maine. After John died, I didn’t know what I wanted to do with the two shops – they take up a huge amount of time, and weren’t yet covering their own costs.  After John died in October of 2016, the shops were barely open during the critical holiday sales season; I couldn’t stand being in them because we had such dreams for the future.

But Johnny loved his little bookstore (Heritage Books, Maps & Ephemera) and the goal was that he would one day “retire” into running the two shops.  So I’ve committed to keeping them open, although Heritage Collectibles is now Heritage Collectibles, Books & Maps as I’ve combined those two businesses, and I’m opening Papa’s Thrift Shop for the inventory that doesn’t really work in the main store.  (Papa is what John’s grandchildren called him.)

All of the profits from those two businesses (after expenses, of course!) will go to support The Warrior Project.  If you are so inclined, please consider checking out our shops, knowing that your purchase will help fund this critically needed suicide prevention drop in center.

Posted in Death & Dying, Grief, Loneliness, Suicide | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Eight Months – And No, I’m Not “Over” Him Yet

You’ve been gone almost 8 months.  Much of the time I can pretend that you’re away, or at work or something, and not think about what really happened.  That way I can block the pain.

But too often, and usually several times a day – like now – it all comes back as horribly painfully as if it happened more recently. Not as painfully as if you had died yesterday, nor like in the first few weeks afterwards, but more like a couple of months after, when the screams that had threatened to rip my heart out of my chest alleviated somewhat.

Years ago I read in some stupid pop psychology article that after a divorce, it takes one month to recover for every year you were married.  So if you were married for 20 years, it would take more than a year and a half to recover; if you were married for one year, it would take just one month.  Horse puckey of course, because it’s different for everyone.

And it certainly is meaningless when a devoted, loving marriage ends through death, whether that death is from a long, slow decline by illness, or a sudden death by accident, or worse, from suicide.

What would that pop psychology expert say to me?  Is there some kind of algorithm for my situation?  John and I were together for more than ten years.  Does the recovery time double when it’s an expected death, and maybe triple when it’s unexpected?  If it’s from suicide, does that make a difference?

I’m sure there are people who are tired of my posts on Facebook, “tagging” John about things he’d find interesting and updating him on the (mis)adventures of the pups.  Those people probably wonder why I don’t just get over it.

Sorry if you’re bored, Sweetie.  My grief is with me every minute, whether I’m actively feeling it or not.  If you’ve never loved anyone as fiercely as I loved my husband, then my first wish for you is that you someday find that kind of love because then you will understand how very precious it is.  And my second wish is that you never lose that love, until you’re old and grey and can go together… because, well, I just wouldn’t wish this on anyone.

*****************************

For more information about The Warrior Project – soon to be a drop-in and counseling center for those affected by suicide and/or suicidal thoughts, please click on the picture or link, or go to https://warrior-project.org.

The Warrior Project will eventually become a warm, welcoming drop-in center for those living with extreme emotional and/or physical pain coupled with hopelessness, and a resource for families and friends fearing for the life of, or grieving the loss of, the person they love so much.

We are accepting blogs and articles written on topics relevant to suicide, hopelessness, grief, and similar topics.  Please contact Linda at LSnyder@regroupbiz.com or warriorprojectmaine@gmail.com.

*************************************

In memory of my beloved husband John Kelly Snyder… 20 Sept 1956 – 21 Oct 2016.

My Johnny was a true warrior, fighting demons no one else could see.  I thought he was the strongest man in the world, and perhaps he was, but tragically, the demons got the better of him.

The name of this project is in no way intended to be reflective of, or piggy back off, Wounded Warriors which serves those military personnel wounded after September 11, 20o1.  Like too many others, John was a warrior long before then.

Fair winds and following seas, Husband.

**************************************

We now have a group on Facebook to help find resources, support and ideas for getting The Warrior Project off the ground.  You can find us there at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thewarriorproject/

Follow us on Twitter!  @WarriorProjME.

**************************************

The Warrior Project is NOT an emergency program or service.

In the event of a crisis, please call 911

In the United States, other numbers to call include:
Maine Crisis Hotline:
1-888-568-1112
National Suicide Prevention Hotline:
800-273-8255
Veterans Suicide Hotline:
800-273-8255
Domestic Violence Hotline:
800-799-7233

*******************************

John and I owned both a small antiques shop and a used bookstore in Lewiston, Maine. After John died, I didn’t know what I wanted to do with the two shops – they take up a huge amount of time, and weren’t yet covering their own costs.  After John died in October of 2016, the shops were barely open during the critical holiday sales season; I couldn’t stand being in them because we had such dreams for the future.

But Johnny loved his little bookstore (Heritage Books, Maps & Ephemera) and the goal was that he would one day “retire” into running the two shops.  So I’ve committed to keeping them open, although Heritage Collectibles is now Heritage Collectibles, Books & Maps as I’ve combined those two businesses, and I’m opening Papa’s Thrift Shop for the inventory that doesn’t really work in the main store.  (Papa is what John’s grandchildren called him.)

All of the profits from those two businesses (after expenses, of course!) will go to support The Warrior Project.  If you are so inclined, please consider checking out our shops, knowing that your purchase will help fund this critically needed suicide prevention drop in center.

Posted in Grief, Loneliness | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Quick Thoughts on the Case of Michelle Carter, Who At Age 17 Convinced Her 18 Year Old Boyfriend to Suicide

https://www.boston.com/news/local-news/2017/06/05/read-the-messages-at-the-heart-of-the-michelle-carter-suicide-by-text-manslaughter-trial

The link above is to the Boston.com article on the trial of Michelle Carter, who has waived a jury trial in a sad, tragic and ultimately horrific case of a 17 year old girl who convinced her 18 year old boyfriend to kill himself.

This is frightening… a teenage girl has no freaking clue how people will feel after a young man suicides. She also has no clue what a young man’s options are – now, or in the future. It doesn’t matter how depressed and hopeless he felt; he was only 18.

And she was just 17.

Children should never try to manage situations as serious as this on their own.

My husband was 60 years old and had been struggling for years. And he had lost his health (he was living with chronic pain so bad it made him nauseous and left him in tears at times, he had advanced emphysema, and he was heavily self-medicating with alcohol, among other problems). Further, he was convinced he had lung cancer, although that hadn’t yet been officially diagnosed despite nearly a year and a half of CT scans and other constant monitoring.

Even so, I would never have encouraged him to kill himself… Had I known he had active suicidal ideation I would have fought it with everything I had in me, just as I was fighting him for giving up on his other health issues.

And I would have continued fighting, at least until it was clear that he had no quality of life, had totally lost his dignity and that there were no other options. At that point I might have stopped fighting but I would never ever have encouraged him.

As far as her statements that his parents would understand and would be sad for a while but would move on…. holy crap.  There can be nothing on this earth worse than losing a child, unless it’s losing a child to suicide.

From a distance it’s hard to know what was going on in Carter’s mind as she repeatedly encouraged Roy to “do it”.  Did she really believe it was the right thing for him to do, or was she getting some kind of vicarious thrill out of pushing him so hard and having so much control over him?  Frankly, I fear it was the latter… she seemed so cool and composed during those texts.

This case is a nightmare.

 

*****************************

For more information about The Warrior Project – soon to be a drop-in and counseling center for those affected by suicide and/or suicidal thoughts, please click on the picture or link, or go to https://warrior-project.org.

The Warrior Project will eventually become a warm, welcoming drop-in center for those living with extreme emotional and/or physical pain coupled with hopelessness, and a resource for families and friends fearing for the life of, or grieving the loss of, the person they love so much.

We are accepting blogs and articles written on topics relevant to suicide, hopelessness, grief, and similar topics.  Please contact Linda at LSnyder@regroupbiz.com or warriorprojectmaine@gmail.com.

*************************************

In memory of my beloved husband John Kelly Snyder… 20 Sept 1956 – 21 Oct 2016.

My Johnny was a true warrior, fighting demons no one else could see.  I thought he was the strongest man in the world, and perhaps he was, but tragically, the demons got the better of him.

The name of this project is in no way intended to be reflective of, or piggy back off, Wounded Warriors which serves those military personnel wounded after September 11, 20o1.  Like too many others, John was a warrior long before then.

Fair winds and following seas, Husband.

**************************************

We now have a group on Facebook to help find resources, support and ideas for getting The Warrior Project off the ground.  You can find us there at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thewarriorproject/

Follow us on Twitter!  @WarriorProjME.

**************************************

The Warrior Project is NOT an emergency program or service.

In the event of a crisis, please call 911

In the United States, other numbers to call include:
Maine Crisis Hotline:
1-888-568-1112
National Suicide Prevention Hotline:
800-273-8255
Veterans Suicide Hotline:
800-273-8255
Domestic Violence Hotline:
800-799-7233

*******************************

John and I owned both a small antiques shop and a used bookstore in Lewiston, Maine. After John died, I didn’t know what I wanted to do with the two shops – they take up a huge amount of time, and weren’t yet covering their own costs.  After John died in October of 2016, the shops were barely open during the critical holiday sales season; I couldn’t stand being in them because we had such dreams for the future.

But Johnny loved his little bookstore (Heritage Books, Maps & Ephemera) and the goal was that he would one day “retire” into running the two shops.  So I’ve committed to keeping them open, although Heritage Collectibles is now Heritage Collectibles, Books & Maps as I’ve combined those two businesses, and I’m opening Papa’s Thrift Shop for the inventory that doesn’t really work in the main store.  (Papa is what John’s grandchildren called him.)

All of the profits from those two businesses (after expenses, of course!) will go to support The Warrior Project.  If you are so inclined, please consider checking out our shops, knowing that your purchase will help fund this critically needed suicide prevention drop in center.

Posted in Suicide | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

No Group, Tuesday May 30

There will be no support group on Tuesday, May 30. The facilitator has been delayed at her day job with a social work issue and will be unable to make it on time.

We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause.

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

The Slam of the Day Does Not Define You

It’s been one of those days…

Aside from the usual day to day stuff that can put one in an irritable mood if one lets it (cold drizzly rain, too much to do, not having the correct paperwork with you when it’s needed, running out of ink in the printer, blah blah), I’ve had to deal with two situations that are costing me time and emotional energy.

In the first, I learned that a package I’ve been waiting for was sent to a post office box in the wrong town, and the person renting that P O box stole my package.  (It had my name on it, so even though it was addressed to the wrong town, my name is still prima facie evidence that the package – and the gifts inside that I’d ordered for family members – did not belong to the box holder.)

I’ve been dealing with PayPal and trying to contact the company I ordered from, as well as the local post office, the local police department, and the theft division of the USPS.  It’s been a hair-pulling experience.

The second instance is a troll who had previously had one of my antiques posts pulled from craigslist after harassing me repeatedly by email, including calling me names.  He was pretty abusive, and I complained to craigslist.  The post – which described an item exactly as how that item has been described many times on one of my antiques subscription services – was reinstated by craigslist until this morning when the self-appointed purveyor of “truth” had the post pulled again.  So once again, I reported him to craigslist.

These are the kinds of things that would have sent me through the roof just a few short weeks ago.  Now, I can handle my anxiety better because I’ve had to learn that one of my worst fears in the world can come true, and I can survive it.  If I can handle John’s suicide without totally losing my mind even when I thought I was going to (a feeling I still have at times), then I suppose I can handle almost anything.  (I think there’s only one other thing in this world that could be worse than his suicide, and if for some reason that ever did come to pass, I probably wouldn’t survive it.)

Anyway, the point of this post is not supposed to be about me.  It’s about John and his depression & anxiety.  It’s about you and your depression and anxiety, or someone you love, and that person’s depression and anxiety.

John took incidents such as the above to heart.  He felt them far too deeply, and far too personally.  He would refer to such things as “the slam of the day” and it would completely color his outlook.  Don’t get me wrong; it’s not like he would go around expressing his anger or his irritation or his upset.  He would make the one comment and then swallow it down.  He would try to act as if everything was okay.

But inside it was festering.

As I tell my clients – over and over and over – if you don’t address it, it will leak out somewhere, somehow, and it won’t be pretty when it does.

And with John, it wasn’t pretty.  He drank too much – which he was able to hide from me for far too long.  He thought about suicide a lot – which he also was able to hide from me until the very end.  His health suffered.  He gave up.

He killed himself in despair and out of fear of being a burden.

I’ve always been similarly reactive to shitty things happening, but I’ve never been good at stuffing my feelings.  And I don’t drink when I’m unhappy.  And my body isn’t falling apart like my husband’s was.

And those apparently are my saving graces… in particular, my penchant for howling out my pain.

Had my Johnny been able to let it out… to scream and cry when he felt the world was against him, when he believed he’d been wronged unfairly, when he ached silently because of the losses in his life – his innocence, his health, and those he loved… he might still be alive.

Anxiety coupled with depression is a hideous pairing.  Small things turn into ogres; larger problems become a nightmare of horrific proportions.  It feels like one is being smothered, with the life being squeezed relentlessly out of one’s body.  It feels like there is no escape.

And it eventually becomes too hard to fight.

I say to each and every person… you are worth it.  You are worth loving. You are worth saving.  If you would fight hard for someone else, then you must understand that you yourself are worth fighting hard for.

The slam of the day is only as big as you allow it to be.  Don’t let the bad stuff define you, no matter how much your anxiety and depression tell you that you are a loser.

You are not.  And if you don’t believe it, ask me.  Because I believe in you.

 

UPDATE!  And a reason why taking things too much to heart can be a waste of time and emotional energy…

After posting this, and after having made numerous calls to the police department, USPS theft division, and local post office, I received a call back from the post office.  They’d found my package.  It was in a bin of mail that was being returned to sender, “addressee unknown”.  So there was no theft.  Yes, it’s true that they might have checked that bin prior to me making several calls (and I now had to call the police and USPS theft division back to let them know), but I was just glad that my package was found.

*****************************

For more information about The Warrior Project – soon to be a drop-in and counseling center for those affected by suicide and/or suicidal thoughts, please click on the picture or link, or go to https://warrior-project.org.

The Warrior Project will eventually become a warm, welcoming drop-in center for those living with extreme emotional and/or physical pain coupled with hopelessness, and a resource for families and friends fearing for the life of, or grieving the loss of, the person they love so much.

We are accepting blogs and articles written on topics relevant to suicide, hopelessness, grief, and similar topics.  Please contact Linda at LSnyder@regroupbiz.com or warriorprojectmaine@gmail.com.

*************************************

In memory of my beloved husband John Kelly Snyder… 20 Sept 1956 – 21 Oct 2016.

My Johnny was a true warrior, fighting demons no one else could see.  I thought he was the strongest man in the world, and perhaps he was, but tragically, the demons got the better of him.

The name of this project is in no way intended to be reflective of, or piggy back off, Wounded Warriors which serves those military personnel wounded after September 11, 20o1.  Like too many others, John was a warrior long before then.

Fair winds and following seas, Husband.

**************************************

We now have a group on Facebook to help find resources, support and ideas for getting The Warrior Project off the ground.  You can find us there at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thewarriorproject/

Follow us on Twitter!  @WarriorProjME.

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The Warrior Project is NOT an emergency program or service.

In the event of a crisis, please call 911

In the United States, other numbers to call include:
Maine Crisis Hotline:
1-888-568-1112
National Suicide Prevention Hotline:
800-273-8255
Veterans Suicide Hotline:
800-273-8255
Domestic Violence Hotline:
800-799-7233

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John and I owned both a small antiques shop and a used bookstore in Lewiston, Maine. After John died, I didn’t know what I wanted to do with the two shops – they take up a huge amount of time, and weren’t yet covering their own costs.  After John died in October of 2016, the shops were barely open during the critical holiday sales season; I couldn’t stand being in them because we had such dreams for the future.

But Johnny loved his little bookstore (Heritage Books, Maps & Ephemera) and the goal was that he would one day “retire” into running the two shops.  So I’ve committed to keeping them open, although Heritage Collectibles is now Heritage Collectibles, Books & Maps as I’ve combined those two businesses, and I’m opening Papa’s Thrift Shop for the inventory that doesn’t really work in the main store.  (Papa is what John’s grandchildren called him.)

All of the profits from those two businesses (after expenses, of course!) will go to support The Warrior Project.  If you are so inclined, please consider checking out our shops, knowing that your purchase will help fund this critically needed suicide prevention drop in center.

Posted in Coping Skills & Resiliency, Death & Dying, Grief, Loneliness, Suicide | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment